Showing posts from March, 2012

Horrifying Mental Images

There are certain things you just don't want to think about when you're leaving the office for lunch.

As I backed out of my parking spot, I looked over and noticed the Wookie's car had a new bumper sticker on it.  It said:

"I'm going commando."

Arrrr, Matey

I started playing The Legend of Dead Kel expansion pack for Kingdoms of Amalur last night.  I call it an expansion pack, because that's basically what it is:  It's a new area on the map with new quests and new mobs and new things to do.  It's not a pack of weapons or anything like that.  It's how DLC should be done.  You get 15% more map to explore for 16.6% of the price of the original game.  I'm sure some self-entitled twat is going to complain about that, but I'm certainly not.

The expansion itself starts out with a pretty basic formula.  You walk into a local tavern, and a man there asks you if you want to make a little extra money.  He then propositions for you to set sail with a crew in a hunt for an undead pirate named Dead Kel and his crew of "Hanged Man" pirates.  I don't know about you, but that sounds like a pretty fun adventure to me.

As expected, your ship crashes on the shore of a new land ripe for exploring.  You spend a bit of time…

"The Threshold"

Before I get to the topic named in the title, I first want to share a rather interesting and well-written article on the subject of internet trolling.  Have a look at it here.

The article caught my eye because I'd just made a post similar to it yesterday.  I think the most frightening part of that article is the suggestion that human beings are actually cruel animals, and we're simply nice to each other because we have to be.  I honestly don't know if that's true or not, but I hope not.

On to the topic at hand, I realized last night that every book I read has a "threshold".  It's the point where I know I will continue reading the book until I'm finished with it.  This threshold varies from book to book, but I always know it when I hit it.

In "The Stand", it was immediate.  I still remember the opening bit.  It was a man named Charlie trying to wake up his wife, because they had to escape.  That hooked me right away.  Escape from what?  What&…

How Do I Human Being?

With the rise of digital distribution for computer games, the Internet is more relevant than ever as an integral part of PC Gaming.  I, for one, love digital distribution, because it allows me to get my games very quickly and without having to worry about losing discs or manuals.  However, with the convenience of the Internet comes all the notoriety along for the ride, and sometimes it can be pretty damned disheartening to consider yourself a part of this community.  If you don't realize what the Internet is, and what the Internet breeds, then you could find yourself pretty shocked when you see what the "majority" of people think about certain topics.

I'm here to give you one very important piece of advice:  Nothing that you see on the Internet is the "majority".  Nothing.  I'll repeat:  NOTHING.  I don't care if you see a comments section where every single person is telling you a game is bad -- it doesn't mean ANYTHING.  I don't care HOW p…


Oh, you think you're so clever, don't you QC?  Well, I'm on to you!  You picked the year Ghostbusters was released on purpose!

I'm hip to your oblique jokes.

Also, there are rumors flying about regarding an Elder Scrolls MMO.

Do.  Not.  Want.

Alternative Timesinks

There are two hobbies that I would embark upon, if I wasn't a gamer.  Actually, there are probably more than two, but these are the two that I currently have on my mind.  Well dammit, now that I'm thinking about it, I have more than these two on my mind.  Like bicycling.  Stop it, brain!

I was thinking about these other two hobbies this morning due to the weather.  That probably seems odd, doesn't it?  Well it'll make sense here in a moment.  Y'see, the weather here has been incredibly nice over the last three days or so. We're talking temperatures in the low 70's and sunshine all day long.  For mid-March in Pennsylvania, that's fantastic.  This has naturally got me thinking about gardening, which is the other hobby I actively pursue in addition to gaming.  (No one can say that my tastes are not broad and varying.)

Since I've been thinking about gardening, yet it's only March, I start thinking back to when I was in high school and also had this …

Nobody Likes My Toenails

The title of this post is a snippet of lyric from the song "Nobody Eats My Dinner".  The song is by a band called Motive, who I hadn't heard of before yesterday.  I heard part of the song on the radio during my quick drive to and from lunch yesterday, and looked the song up on YouTube when I got back into the office.  I'll embed the music video below.  The lyrics as a whole, if you haven't been able to tell already, are utterly non-sensical.  But, I can't stop listening to the song.  It's one of those cases where it sounds brilliant, so long as you don't really pay attention to what he's saying.  The guitar is fantastic.  The very beginning actually reminds me quite a bit of "Don't Fear the Reaper", which as anyone knows has brilliant guitar strings in it.  I'll embed that song for you too, in case you'd like to listen to it.  That song is from 1976 -- y'know, back when all those hipsters claim that music was still "…

Internet Tips

Today I'm going to provide you with the fastest and most reliable methods to piss off the Internet.

1. Have your own opinion.
2. Disagree with someone.
3. Think for yourself.
4. Say that you like any one of the following things:  The Star Wars prequels, Comic Sans font, Dragon Age 2, Internet Explorer, Apple, Ikea, or Day 1 DLC.

These surefire steps will ensure you get your face flamed right off!

Yeah, I Went There

I figured, since I haven't made a blog post in a few days, that I would write a nice, informative, thought-provoking post this evening.  I lost the will to do so shortly thereafter, so allow me to provide you with this wonderfully philosophical idea.

You're welcome.

Also, I thought I'd try to surprise John by getting back into League of Legends.  So I purchased Nautilus and went into a bot game to practice with him, and I learned something very important -- I despise League of Legends.  Pretty much every facet of it.

Weighing the Price

Would you work a job that pays a million dollars a year where all you did is sit in front of a computer while someone pokes you in the back of the head every two minutes?  I pose the question because I want to talk about how much frustration a normal person is willing to endure in order to have their desired luxuries.  And, I want to keep things in relative perspective, which is more to keep myself in line because this is a topic that tends to get me very, very pissed off.

There's a lot of drama surrounding the release of Mass Effect 3, and that's what I'm specifically going to be talking about here.  And don't worry -- this post will be completely spoiler free.

The drama with the game started before it was released with the announcement that there will be day 1 DLC available for $10.  (Or, for those who pre-ordered the collector's edition, it's already included.)  This led to a lot of internet rage and calls for a boycott that won't work.  Internet rage is…


Oh Monday, why do you suck so much ass?

It all started with the discovery that winter apparently doesn't start until March anymore.  I go upstairs and there's fucking three inches of snow on the ground, and it's still snowing like a bitch.  (I don't know how bitches snow, but if bitches did snow, it would have been snowing like one.)  Immediately that makes my day shit, because it means I have to drive amongst a flock of fuckheads who think that because there are two snow flurries falling from the sky, it means they can drive 20 miles-o-fucking-hour in the fast lane.

The day got worse before I even left the house.  As I was flossing, a large piece of one tooth snapped right off.  Right in the front.  Wonderful -- as if I wasn't self-conscious enough about the appearance of my teeth.  Even on a day that's complete shit, I can still find positives, though.  One, the broken tooth doesn't actually hurt at all, so that's a blessing.  Two, I already have a den…

Son of a BITCH!

First of all, this had me laughing until I was in tears:

I love Jon Stewart.  And I love Neil Tyson, though I'll be the first to admit I had no idea who he was before he became a meme.

Now, in bigger news, I finished KoA.  Literally finished it.  I have NO MORE QUESTS.  I did ALL the quests!  I'm sure there are some that I missed out there in the forest, but I don't care!  I'm done!  Whee!

"DLC announced for Kingdoms of Amalur, adding 15% more area to explore and more quests.  Out March 20th."

Son of a BITCH!

In any case, the ending was epic.  The story was a bit weak in that it eluded to you having a choice in things, but you really didn't have any choice whatsoever in how the game ended.  That was a bit lame.  But it was presented well!

I'm just glad I finished it before ME3 came out.