Lately I've been contemplating closing down this blog.  To be perfectly honest, I don't find that I have much to talk about these days.  While it's true that I do enjoy talking about games, the simple fact of the matter is that there are approximately two billion people who also like talking about games, and a vast majority of those people are better at it than I am.  I've said from the start that I write for my own personal benefit, but it's also true that it does become difficult to do something when you don't see much point in it.

To point out further degradation of my enthusiasm for posting here, I can think of several recent things I could have written about that I just simply didn't.  That includes the garden, which is now in full bloom, my thoughts on 3D technology after seeing The Amazing Spider-Man, and my recent experiences with Killing Floor.  Any of those would have made good material for posts here.  And the truth is, it's not exactly correct to state that I didn't -want- to post about those things, though that does admittedly have a bit to do with it.  No, it's more that I didn't see the POINT in it.  I didn't feel I could make the posts interesting enough.

That may lead you to ask me why the hell I'm posting now, since this post is certainly uninteresting.  Well, it's therapy.  I've written as a form of therapy for years now.  As with most things, however, my current distaste for blog posts is not the cause of my frustrations, but rather a symptom of it.  I at least think so, anyway.  And now I'm about to write about some first-world problems.  Sorry, little starving African kids!

The first problem as i see it relates to my job.  For about three or four months, I was incredibly busy.  It was stressful, it sapped a lot of hours beyond my normal working days, and it was generally unenjoyable.  However, it provided me with something very important; something that is now lacking from my day-to-day life.  That something is accomplishment.  I've gone back to normal everyday tasks, and while I wouldn't necessarily say that I'm bored I would say that I'm not getting as much satisfaction out of what I'm doing.  Do I enjoy it?  Certainly.  Am I comfortable where I'm at?  Most definitely.  Am I being challenged?  Not so much, and there's the whole problem.  I'm left with a nagging and irritating feeling of frivolity.

So what's the solution?  Well, I need to find something that will give me that same personal satisfaction and feeling of accomplishment.  It's not like I haven't been trying, mind you.